‘Must be something you ate…’ I mumble to her.
I put my hand on her belly and caress her soft skin. My soothing strokes seem to console her, at least for now. Still asleep, she twitches as a racing pain suddenly shoots through her.
‘Don’t worry, I’m here, it’ll all be okay…’
A large bang resonates from far away on the other side of the city. I only hear it when whatever caused it has already stopped. The city looks like she’s going to wake up soon. More rumbling, shakier than before, more restless.
‘Calm down, babe, calm down.’
She starts to shake heavier now. I’m holding on to her rather than caressing her. Around me buildings collapse into the earth without leaving a trace. There is sound, but it seems subdued and distant. She seems scared now, it’s clear it wasn’t her diet that caused this. I already knew it, though.
‘Don’t be scared, you’ll be fine,’ I lie.
Poor thing. More and more of her is disappearing. All disappearing buildings and traces leave empty scars in the landscape. A desert waiting for sand to come. She is powerless to stop it. The heavy shaking upsets me too, I lay down on her still warm body and hold on, closing my eyes.
‘Let go, just let yourself go.’
I open my eyes again, recognising nothing any more. A barren landscape, an unconventional abyss. The shaking stops. Wind lifts me up, taking me elsewhere, away from her, leaving a silent goodbye as I watch her becoming smaller and smaller, until she becomes nothing but a soulless dot.
The way it should be.
photo taken at Tim’s studio, Wedding, March 2012